Merry Christmas

I've been saving this one. Dec 21 I was doing a mad dash to clean the house while Danny went to the airport to pick up Danna, Chris and Jen. I don't know why I even bother because with 7 people in our 1100 sq ft house at Christmas with luggage and presents and air mattresses everywhere our house is pretty much a disaster. 

While I was cleaning Sam came over to me and told me that he pooped his pants. I've been toying with the idea of having him clean himself up after an accident for quite some time now. Looking back, this was the wrong time to try something new. I told him to go up to the bathroom and get started cleaning up the poop and I would be up in a few minutes. 

I got up there and there was a huge pile of poop on the floor in front of the toilet. He had obviously only had a small accident in his pants and had (for some godforsaken reason) gone upstairs and taken a giant shit on the floor. 

I'm stupid and figured, in for a penny in for a pound, so I told him he needed to clean it up. Unfortunately that meant him using a wipe to rub the pile of poop, spreading it out and getting shit on literally everything in the bathroom. 20 minutes before our company was arriving. I talked him through the cleanup and did the final wipe down myself, to make sure nothing was missed. 

I finished just as Danny pulled in the driveway, thank god. Of course we spent Christmas barfing and blowing our noses, but that's another nightmare altogether. It's a good thing we like each other.