Good Question

D: Sam hit me. 

Me: Did you tell him you didn't like it and ask him to stop?

D: Yes. 

Me: No you didn't. 

D: How do you know?

Me: Because I can hear you. 

D: Then why did you ask?

My Pin-gina

S: Ow, my pingina. 

Me: You don't have a vagina. 

S: My pingina. 

Me: You still don't have a vagina. 

S: I have a penis!

Me: That's right. 

S: Hey, penis starts with a puh, puh sound!

Me: Yes it does. 

Unnecessary Roughness

K: So what did you do at school today?

D: Sometimes I just need to slap myself in the face a few times before I remember. 

More like a girl...

Sam picked up the face paint we used for his costume yesterday and told me that I needed more makeup to look more like a girl. I don't think he's destined to be a cosmetician.